Monday, August 25, 2003

Three Hearts and Being a Teddy Bear for Life

As the days go nearer and nearer to the time I'm leaving Manila, people, places and things suddenly come rushing to fore as to who or what I'm going to miss the most...especially certain people,people who I want to spend my life with most. Three of them live here in Manila, and it kinda sucks I can't do anything since I don't know what to do...I mean I'm confused as to whom I gonna choose. Surprised? People will rant that you should choose the one you love most, the one who you feel closest too. Well, I liked them all equally, not yet to the point of loving, but going in that general direction. Hmm.....

The one I feel closest to is Miss Alto. I can see myself with her when I grow up, and the decision to choose her is weighed heavily as I'm very close to the family. She's funny, has the same likes as me, is intellectual and I'm totally connected to her. But...i don't know. I can't seem to make the move, some kind of barrier is right in front of me, forcing me to stop. Hmmm...oh well, maybe I can overcome it before I leave, whatever that is.

Next is the Ice Lady. She's very outspoken and a feminist to boot(not the raving one, I assure you, but the one that recognizes equality to both sexes and is very firm about it). What attracted me to her is that...honestly , I don't really know. We rarely see each other, yet when we meet, there's this certain spark in her eyes and a tinkle of laughter that's makes my knees shiver (She doesn't laugh at anything else, period. She's also very abrupt and even sometimes abrasive. That's why I named her Ice Lady) She knows about Miss Alto, and I know some of her suitors. We're best friends, quite frankly told me that I'm one of the few guys she can open up to. If you know her personally, that's quite a big compliment. Also, I'm kinda close to her family, though that's not a big factor.

Last one I'll call her Princess, because she so sweet and charming. Frankly, I know she likes me a lot and is dropping hints already. She's really caring and cute and beuatiful, but ... again I don't know. There's something about her that makes me pause, and the fact I've already invested much to Miss Alto.

Well, that's it, the women in my lives, hehe. Actually, those who know me in my know I go out with lots of beautiful girls and yet never courted one of them, having conditioned myself that I am their one true male friend. And that sucks sometimes, if you asked me. A female best friend once remarked to me that I'm everybody's friend, yet since I'm friends to everyone, I can't find the right girl for me who'll take me seriously. I do remember the time I did once go over the line of friendship and tried to court a friend. The results where disastrous, I spent the last three years mending the relationship.

But it does have some perks, like there was this time I was at the gaming store and was talking with my buddies, when a Mossimo model friend of mine needed me for an emergency. Now the gaming store is composed totally by males, and the time she came in was liked a shockwave. People were gawking at her, and you could almost hear the dripping sound of saliva. Ah, the perks of being a big brother. After she left (she needed to borrow my phone since her battery's dead), I went back to my friends smugly grinning. I did explain to them that I'm her big bro, and would not tolerate any foolishness if ever she come looking for me again. Looking back, I don't know why girls open up to me and don't feel concious when I'm around. Another female friend said I'm like a big teddy bear, someone to hug, tell stories to, cry tears at it and, in some cases throw around if in a pique of anger. Now, I don't know whether to feel insulted or complimented, but hey, I guess I should take it optimistically.


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