Wednesday, December 03, 2003

It's All In The Mind

I'm tired.

Not the regular tiredness you get from days of stress but bone numbing tiredness that seeps to every pore of your body, making your muscles worthless as if they athropied in a single night.

I'm tired like an old man on his lastfew breaths of life, but nevertheless refuses to give up, mouthing profanities at Death.

I'm tired like a man after staying the night on a Sultan's harem, getting it on with every girl on sight. Man, now that's one metaphor for explaining how exhausted you are. I'm pretty sure you get the picture.

The started innocently enough, typical December weather, blue skies and cool winds. Had to pick up Mossimo Girl at her house, then we went to Adamson College to her modeling gig. Now, Adamson would only be a 15 minute ride if I was on the province but since this Manila, it took us over a fricken hour just to get to Taft Avenue. That's one thing I will not miss, the bumper to bumper traffic. Which is why I prefer walking to a 30 minute destination then sitting my butt off a cab or jeep for over 2 hours. Sheesh...

Arriving at the college confirmed my worst premonitions. Everyone seemed to have their eyes glued to her. Arrrrgh, I should bought a baseball bat. But nevertheless, it was a trifle disconcerting to be at the center of attraction, even if I was just off center. In the end though, it was all cool, since nobody had the guts to approach her when we got to the stage site.

Man oh man, I really hate models. The airheaded ones only of course, which I think comprimises 90% of modeldom. I never met a model who isn't shallow, naive, in love with himself/herself or just plain stupid. Sure, some of my model friends weren't like that... though I'll concede just a little. Besides, they wouldn't be my friends if they fit in the above's description.

Perhaps I wouldn't be so tired if I ate a little something on the way over. Fate decided that not eating breakfast, lunch and small snacks is a good thing, since I didn't get the time to even bite a nibble. So it was I spent the night on an empty stomach, finally filling up my poor tummy after the practice, at around 10pm. Thank God I wouldn't be doing this again tommorow.

Or maybe the fact that I'm tired is tommorow is the day we're gonna do a video exposition, and I have to bring my PC at a friend's house to work on it. It could be that my body, reacting to future possibilites, knows how tiring that prospect is and making me feel the pain now. Even thinking about it just makes me cold all over again.

Ah well, at least I get to have my time off in the afternoon, where I finally get my wish of a massive battle against the Dark Elves. Hmmm, I wonder how would it go, since this is the first time I playing at the 4000 point level. The weird thing is, even if that also is a tiring venture which involves 3-4 hours of gaming and constant headache of tactics and strategy, it actually reveals itself to be invigorating and pleasing to me.

Hmmm, on reflection, it's perhaps all on the mind. While doing something you don't like or don't really care makes you tired just by thinking about it, doing something you look forward too makes you forget the exhaustive qualities that come with it. Just thinking about the video expo makes me crawl on my knees, while on the other hand playing the game raises my euphoria to heights unknown, perhaps shielding me from tiredness. I know I'm friggin' tired ( yet strangely elated ) after a good game.

So I'm guessing is that we should be optmistic and love everything we do, so that in time we can have the boundless energy of the Energizer Bunny and make all things possible. It's all really on the mind. Think about it, if we love our country, none of the graft, corruption and other crap would happen and in the end actually make the country work for us, not the other way around. If we put our backs into it, we could actually become Asia's top country. I know it's hard but thinking that everything is not impossible helps, and if have the "gana" to do everything right then the stars would be our limits, perhaps even farther. Again it's all in the mind, and the mind has infinite possibilities. If I put my own mind into it, anything is possible.


Amanda Griffin, you will be mine.


State of Mind: Age Old Tiredness
Song of the Day: Barey Breathing by Duncan Sheik
Cartoon of the Day: He-Man and Masters of the Universe
Sleep required to recuperate after all of this: 14 hours


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